04.13.04

"We were surprised when we found out that love feels just like pain...I always heard I could get hurt, I knew that from the start, break my face, my back, my arms, my neck, but please don't break my heart" --K's Choice

I admit it. I am kind of a crier. As a kid, I would cry at sad stories (Disney's "Small One" was a big boo hoo-fest), sad songs (Puff the Magic Dragon always got me – DO NOT laugh!), seeing animals run over on the side of the road, and even touching TV commercials (and who didn’t cry at Kleenex commercials, anyway?)

As I got older, there was maybe a little less crying, but I would still be very empathetic to other people’s pain and loneliness. It always made me sad to see older people eating alone in restaurants for some reason…I have been made fun of for that one frequently.

As an artist, it’s good to be in touch with your emotions. You need to soul search and have a little heartbreak to write good songs – at least the kind that I like the best. Give me a rip-your-heart-out ballad with a bittersweet melody and I am in my element. I’m likely to play it 100 times and learn every word and note until I can sing it by heart. And I might just cry about it, too.

Call me melodramatic, call me a romantic, call me emotional. I’d rather lead with my heart than my head – even if it gets me hurt in the process. There are days when I feel cynical or jaded or just fed up with this life, like anyone. But I want to be like that little girl who wears her heart on her sleeve, who doesn’t build a fortress to keep safe from hurt, who cries when Lassie comes home.

So, go ahead and tell me I’m a crybaby. I’m sensitive. And I’d like to stay that way.