Salmonfish

"Have you seen the little piggies rolling in the dirt?" -Beatles

Once upon a time, there was a chinese buffet restaurant. It was much beloved by all of my co-workers for the excellent selection, but most of all for the entertainment value. In the interest of protecting the innocent, I won't give the real name - in our office it was simply known as "Salmonfish."

There was always a big old slab of salmon swimming in butter on the buffet and the label announced it to the world as "Salmonfish." This place was a veritable holy land of broken English and poor spelling in print. We had many, many favorites, and would get excited to tell the group if there was a new food item on the buffet with a particularly interesting spelling.

The servers were always harried, never pleasant, and a little scary to be honest. But our drinks were kept full and we could handle feeding our bellies. The best day was when one of the "smooth talkers" in the office decided to chat up our usual server and be nice to her. Her response was (and I quote) "Don't talk to me - I too busy!"

Then one bright, crisp day a group of us decided it was a Salmonfish day. Much to our dismay, when we got to the door (after seeing several Hazmat trucks in the parking lot - coincidence?) there was a sign stating they were closed. And in true Salmonfish fashion they stated they were "Sorry for inconve neice."

Much sadness and dismay was stated, and some of this was documented in my favorite medium, Haiku. For your pleasure, I am posting my tribute as well as those of co-worker M.

Viva la Salmonfish. We know we won't like the Thai Buffet that is taking its place nearly as much.

*****************************
No seafood conbo?
No frence fried with hot mastard?
Oh, my chicken ball.

Salmonfish no more
We're forced to eat fresh food now
Greatest tragedy

No shellfish surprise…
No sour waitresses await..
Gloom rules this sad day.

Thai doesn't cut it…
Peanut butter is not good...
as a condiment.

(and my thoughts on us e-mailing each other haiku...)

I think we’re brilliant
With due modesty, of course
As great as Basho

(If we do this more
I won’t be able to stop
It’s just like breathing)